Kids, Some Certain Thing You Need To Know~

For my younger friends,
Friendship is like a fantastic person to be with. To have fun with. To play with. Here is the thing you need to know. Someday when you all gets older and older you'll see how sensitive they and you yourself will become. Jealousy? Sort of. Fight? Sure things. In this world I learned that there are like limited place or room for a big friendship. Maybe only couple of them could fit in. Maybe right now we use to be with our 30 best friends but look around. How many are there remains to stay? I myself have like hundreds of them. Right now I feel like I only have a couple of them.


Dear friends, No offense. 

Sometime I try to talk with some of them. I really want to share something really fantastic I ever felt or something real sad I wanna cry with but then I found that just... It means nothing. I felt like I'm one of the abandon one from the group so I started to stay a distance. Even with my stepsister.. Milya, sorry Milya. How I always wish she could replaces my past one. However, she doesn't deserve the seat. No one could replace it. But no worry, I have someone else who I trust much. Love could understand me better than being in this position.

Ain't that pathetic and selfish? Well yeah I am.

Maybe all this thing I'll never have it. However, I guess that's important too. So I won't be bully anymore. I'll keep on standing the only way I can. I don't need some hand. They are just wasn't sincere enough. I'm sorry.

Mum always said,
'Never trust someone too much because some certain things, just wasn't fervently nice as their deeds.'

And again I'm sorry.
Still think that it sounds selfish? Can you count my apologize? How many are they? And do you ever say one?

I'm weak and sensitive. Now that I got myself here I start to be competitive. Of course. Even you yourself right now. Be honest... I know. You can just put the blame on me. Yes everything about me. I don't wanna win in this battle. Push me aside and stand for yourself. I'll just tap out and surrender. I'll just state here all you say about me is always right... You are always right.. And all my facts are wrong. Well I agree with you. Then you win everything. Why would you wanna compete against me again? Want me to suffer in tears. I already am. Want me to die? Well you should know I'm not stupid to listen. You are not my lord to give me order. Didn't you learn that?

What kind of friend like this?
I wonder...
Maybe I was stupid. Not to judge someone properly. Fine. Say anything. I don't need friend like this.

I lost my way without them.
Enough is enough. I say that in a pathetic.

I just fervently say,
You are still a friend.

They start to be nice in front of me. But at the back? I could just remain silence and stay out of business. I can't change anyone thoughts. I just can live in my own fantasy.