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January 27, 2011

Skated Away From The Youth Of Authority

     Pathetic laugh and idiot smile, definitely maybe. That's the look on my face when I was outside of my class. Even inside too. Staring to the sky, if only I could make myself free with my own wings... If only I could touch the sky and lay down my sword into the sun. All the impossible I wanna do. What if I couldn't make it? I'll stop hoping but I never look down to the ground. As the matter of fact, I never stop believing all those shit I could done. Maybe I might be broken down or misjudged. Don't matter the outcome or crap that's coming. I'll start to stand up in this youth. Sometime we felt like crying, try cry it out sometime. Sometime we felt like we're running from shit but as the matter of fact, there is no point of hiding. A true warrior stands in his shadow and light, it goes black and white.

     Sometime I felt like I was funny but the harder that I try to do that the more it shows how desperate I am. I'm not happy. I wish I can see my girl again and always but there is a drain kept separating us. I miss the old time back to previous year where it begins and cycles. Take my way back I begin to smile, if only that could happen but our days are slipping away. Each day we'll get older and we're never gonna get back any younger. Looking back through photographs I was picturing a frame of love each second of my heart pumps.

     A thick sweater, it never keeps me warm. It does protect me from catching cold but its not the touch of warmth. When I stand up and watch the vision, I was looking through the window. A hug of hers made me gone warm.. I could close my eyes and fall into it, just like how much she'll pick me up every time I fall. I miss all those feelings. The love that keeps me warmth always but in this world that each single time it makes us colder.

     60 miles I've been traveling with a black shadow sword to hold onto and a dark black leather jacket with jean. I'll get onto my feet and start the day of moving like a song. Not expected to be notice but just to shine out the person I am who isn't accepted in this town much. Don't matter what, I'll make no difference and the matter of fact, I need my love by my side...

     i miss her

January 16, 2011

Tell Yourself First

     Here is the most common thing where we all learn from our teacher but some of it are really silly. Now I'm not mentioning to all of the teacher but some part of them which are actually more than half of them. They say "don't judge the book by its cover". Well I can say the cover not quite like the book. Which those people actually haven't read my book. But right this spot here I'm gonna say those teacher are really stupid where they define Punk. Have they really see who the hell are we? When I say we, I'm saying Punk cause I'm one part of it. Purely. This fellow here define it as rubbish or trash or whatever. I'll say a silly shit is going on. Not just a shit. A lot more. The hair is one symbol of it where you could see all those spikes symbolize gravity. We are rebellion and even try to go against gravity. Why are we doing this? Its not just for fun even we say it that way.

     One reason why we all go against rules is because its silly where we gotta change ourselves for not being how we're suppose to be. We hate rules but we still respect people when we're on their authority so we follow the guide line of the rules. I'm not saying we break rules for fun but rules are meant to be broken sometime. They say we gotta respect them while they don't respect us. Here is a sensitive part where they all view us like a criminal or even killer. Now I'm not just mentioning some teacher but even my own parents and those citizen. Not forget, rich people. The government is one of our enemy because they look down to us. Why must publisher reject our music because its Punk? We're just playing music with honest lyric and why doesn't stupid songs were published? What does those popular song about? I heard even song about sex, money and it could be famous. What the hell are those?

     What is wrong with our music? Have they ever heard of us? Rancid, Sid Vicious, Big D & The Kids Table, The Sex Pistol, The Ramones, Zebrahead and a lot more to mention. All they wanna do is play their music with their own way and sing it to show their anarchism. Its a voice of freedom. Where anarchy represents us stating the property is theft and there should be no master or king. Whose gonna be the king? We're all must have our own right and freedom to choose. Let ourselves decide what we want and we're know what we're doing. Don't compare us with status or money. We're all discriminated but we're not vulnerable because our spirit is one thing which is unbreakable.

     Now to mention it again. When that teacher said Punk are rubbish, doesn't he judge us by the cover? Now I know what people think about us but everybody else gotta see through different eyes from the outside looking in. Now take it a look at me, carefully. Don't rage the anger. I won't give a Punk to anyone but I'll make sure I can play with them with rocks. When it goes that way, everyday is gonna be nightmare. Well, I'm not joking but don't bully us or take it down to us. I know there are not much of people like me but anywhere you see in every country, there are some of us.

     Look at our clothes, hairs and even songs. They are all huge different but its the same because we're all Punk. Every single Punk we all treat them like a family. I respect them. Turn the page of the book, don't just see the label but read it. Read my book.

     As the matter of fact, I know they hate us because we're different. However, we never hate them back because we have our life and they have their own so why would I care? They don't like us is their own business. You can take nothing from me and its better to be me.

“Undermine their pompous authority, reject their moral standards, 
make anarchy and disorder your trademarks. 
Cause as much chaos and disruption as possible but don’t let them take you ALIVE.”
Sid Vicious (in memory 1957-1979)

Limited Seconds

     This is the part where it'll reach your heart real deep when it come first in line where you meet your girlfriend after quite a long time you haven't meet her. From far you can see she's waiting and you start feeling worry if she's getting upset for you being late but when you're there... It'll reach your heart for the first when she saw you... and smile... Then you start acting funny or silly to light her mood up. By that time you'll get sweet and all you wanna forget is being sad... You start looking at the clock and I can tell you that all you want is to have a great time with her.

     Second thing is where you feel very free and all those shit around you'll start ignore. Sometime you even forget. You'll hold your anger and stop all the craps around you by just making her smile. You'll start buying roses or even count every single dollar you got just to spend for her. That's all you wanna do without even she asks for it but that's because you want her to be happy but one thing I know about my girlfriend is the greatest part was being by my side. I need her and always.... 

     Third thing goes when she surprises you with something you didn't expect that time. I just had a great day today and surprised kiss on my cheek. It makes me smile to think of it again and its really cute. I started to feel blush by the same time, I kissed her back. Staring in her eyes, I wish I can forever be reflected in there. 

     The hardest part was when you gonna say goodbye. I don't like it because I'm not gonna see her again. I'm feeling lonely without her. Where there are so much web of spiders, they are catching things and ate them. Like I was trap and not being able to let go of this and as the matter of fact I know, I'm not limiting myself but I'm not a happy person. Being with her makes me happy. I never smile because I don't feel like it, but when saw her.... I can cry with tears on my eyes. I miss her....

     5 hours spent, it felt like a couple of minutes. Its never enough... Really. When you say goodbye it felt like "will I ever see her again?". Once you're home you start sending her a text message then it goes on and on until the night. You'll never get bored doing it over and over again. Right this part here is the part where you start thinking how you wish it could be a lot more longer. I miss her....

     The next morning you got up, first you move like a ninja reaching your phone. I got that a lot of time.  

"I don't have the money to buy you roses,
But I'll take you to the garden,
And you'll get to be a beautiful butterfly"

January 12, 2011

A Soluble Summer, I Had Too Much Coke

A Little Chapter Of The Book, "A Soluble Summer"

     I'm looking for another chapter, funny how it never does. I try to make like it was but the more I do it the little that I know. Until the day today I realize I made it another book without its front cover... Its been missing. I wonder will anyone help me up some shit to settle this but sadly, not a single bit. If I could find another chapter I'll state my message clear but for now its a morning in the night where I think that I can. Not until I end up with too many coke... What am I thinking? Or is it just another chapter of the book.

     A single day which is quite similar to the others. Yet a rainy summer on January. Invisibility to shines and with empty light that reflects my body. Nothing could make a chance. Well I was a warrior who is born to never care. Where people moaned their shit everyday and I wasn't shock expecting the already expected. Which it was that simple. Never the less.

     A black garden in the town of a small village with sixth feet tall of shadow. They say "never enter during summer". However I started to run and put down a lot part of me but no they can take nothing from me. Not even a bit of attention I was scold to be someone I hate the most and not a little sense of shit... I learned they can take nothing from me.

     A lonely day to start with, yet the longer it goes the harder it seems. The little the less that I know it wasn't just another chapter, its not even the title. It just another note of winter... Before the summer could appear when I'm standing on a day of a soluble summer.

"Young enough that I can"

January 10, 2011

A Girl With A Basket.... (TRUE STORY)

See through the mountain
First thing for sure before I begin please take not this is not a story or comedy or whatever. This is not even a fairytale story or another shit. What the hell? Well for sure this is an opening, not an essay opening cause that's gonna get me a fail. Anyway lets begin.

     Once a upon a time... Cut the shit. Millions of edge but ever thought about being it? There are people live there and some they even suffer to live there? Where will that be? Ever figure it out? Can't? Of course. 

     A crocodile in the farm... Okay now cut the shit really... Thousand miles of journey I wonder where does people put their head? Have they ever think about others? Now stop the ego and give others a second of break, think of why others don't ever care about how you feel. There must be reason but why the fuck are there those who hate them for being themselves? Its funny. Since 1994 I was born I never knew I must be someone who is not me. If so then that's not Liz anymore.

     What was I'm trying to say here? A girl with a basket? It doesn't sound interesting to certain people. Yeah cause some might think the title is BORING. I know but I wanna tell a story about an amazing girl, which I don't know who the hell is that, she comes with a basket. Yeah. BASKET. So what is she doing with that basket? Selling flower... Wait, no, that's pretty common. She sells diamond, inside the basket there is a lot of luxury. Nobody would believe that cause what would a diamond do in such a basket?

     I have no idea what on earth is this? ......

The end.... What I'm trying to say is don't judge too soon.... Even in a weird way (I'm happy in my mental health)

January 05, 2011

Memories Of A Fighter........

Its not just a cat, its more than that... He's a fighter... He comes from a village called LS. He followed dad until all the way home here. Its different, super friendly, he didn't even scared of us.... He eats ice cream mixed up with coke. Funny cat, thats his favorite food.....

I went home just now. Mum didn't left me key so I wait in front of the house gate, it was raining so I climbed into the gate cause I got wet. I walk behind the house I saw his sleeping there. That was the first thought. The second time I went out its still there, funny... I thought it scared of water? I touch it and his body was super hard that time.... So I carried it up and it didn't react at all... Its dying.... Desperately breathing.... I called mum and sis... They saw him... I couldn't stand it... I sat there crying, company him.... Until his last breathe...

By 3.00pm.... that was the time he's gone.... Forever........ I don't know what's more to say..... Here are some photograph...

Lawaii, a brave cat.... He survived from his Lung Cancer and suffered with a half-blinded eye....

In Memory, Lawaii,
5Th January 2011, 3.00 p.m.

Dearest Lawaii,
"Your not just a cat but you are one of our family... My best friend. You are more than a cat. Every single frame you made me smile and laugh at the same time, I'll keep that in memory... You are strong and brave enough, you survived from your lung cancer and you made it alive for a long time until today.... Farewell..."

Love, Liz


January 02, 2011

Schoolyard Rotten Candy

pictured taken by internet
Just registered at school. The only high school I'm study in. Real empty now. The morning I step by I know this isn't the best day of life, things are getting different but I still felt the same way it use to be. As if nothing change but a lots gone.... I wonder how does it goes before all this? It never happen this way before, when it was there....

I can feel the wind, yeah its lonely and now a lot of things are missing. I couldn't see much, cause it wasn't there. All we have is what left today, part of this left in spoken place. She was there waiting for me, the dawn for morning to shine. That makes the day an opening goes perfectly. I saw her there just now, and I smiled at her shadow. I was only dreaming.... I miss that time....

I pass her class just now, she used to sit there near the right wall. Her table was the one with a lots of writing, same as mine too. I still remember how we spent time at that class where until things are getting a lot crazier. I had tears on my eyes passing by. Its not gonna be the same this time, I'll have my time at school alone... Maybe she's going to be somewhere else.... Overseas? Far away? I'm not sure about that. Nothing much left than empty comments. Wherever she'll be, I just wish she's going to be there safely and have a great time. I'm going nowhere, not until I graduate here. My time is not over yet. I'll have a lot more to learn. 

January comes, I can't wait for February. How is Valentine going to be? I hope she'll be there... My birthday is coming too... Also Chinese New Year. Gonna head way back to JB. I can't wait for March, short the words, I can't wait to end this days. 

I'm gonna make a wish. I'll be thinking of it and I wonder too, how many people would remember without notification at Facebook?

The sidewalk,
One past funny line, where we used to cross along to the house where we went for a drink. We used to be there, and seems like it always welcome us. When there was me, there's always be you. We'll have the same drink and sit next to each other and I still remember every time you kiss me and our dinner together at beautiful places.

"Its a new start, gotta do what suppose to be done."

As the matter of fact, those sweet time were amazing.... Tomorrow will be my first at school...

I miss her