"I want to walk pass this river.
So I took the bridge I see up ahead of my direction.
Despite knowing the destination I might get into.
I walk to it...
And I walk into a huge layers of fog that killed my visuals.
I was unable to see, unable to know and unable to feel what's ahead.
I wasn't alone for I had you to hold onto my hand but we had let go of it.
It don't matter who did it but it does matter for who was at fault.
I could have catch you but instead I lost my track and took the wrong path.
And so it had been 581 days of mine walking on this bridge.
I may be alone or maybe not for I believe you might as well be walking on the same path of mine.
However, I am not pretty sure if you had made it without me.
Or maybe you did.
Or maybe I truly was alone after all.
I was swallowed by the fog.
Not anybody could found me yet.
I found myself crying over this music where I used to play. It was the song I shared to you as well.
"Into Your Arms." From my favorite band...
I cut my nails for after awhile I had been keeping it.
I cut my hairs for after awhile I had left it grows.
But I can't cut the number of days I had the hardest time learning these reality without you.
I see my life as a pointless dream without you.
But I treasure every dream for I could had the touch of love with you.
When you hold me tight, I can feel it for how much you had love me.
I'm all dried out of words to speak for I have nothing much left to say but too much to feel.
I'm writing them out all in words to line up every sort of spoken notes in my head.
I can hear voices of yours and voices of mine where the day I could laugh without faking it.
I wanna see those light you show me and those tiny little sight that you could cut through these fog for me to see through it...
I want you by my side without the need of anyone to know what's right or wrong.
Because you are what I need in life and I'm stating it out with this heart of mine.
That had been drowned in the flood of love and I barely caught myself dying.
I maybe be nullified on the expression of mine but my feeling lives for as long as I breath on earth.
And I want you to come lead me out of the fog if you could.
Jen, it had been 581 days I couldn't call your name.
I couldn't speak to you.
Or even to see you smiling at me.
I couldn't see you looking into my eyes.
I couldn't feel you in my hands...
And I couldn't feel I'm alive in your life.
If it takes me to lose everything for me to reverse my time and get back to the days we were fighting over our future... I would be more than ready to change them. I don't mind. But I will come back with a new me so I could bend over those ugly pain that I gave... only....
If you need me.
Or maybe not.
I can't tell.